Schatz - Treasure

One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. If this old axiom is true, there’s some very odd people out there. Going through my trash - no, rubbish - there’s nothing remotely valuable or even vaguely collectable. It’s mostly crisp packets, biscuit wrappers and currently, due to my massively annoying cold, lots and lots of soggy, used tissues. If there really is someone out there who’d be ecstatic at the prospect of finding my snotty rags, I suppose I should be flattered. The only ‘treasure’ I possibly discard on a regular basis is stuff that might possibly be recyclable, and thus a source of income for some extremely poor and impoverished sod. Now a ludicrously rich idiot might throw away something more like it, such as a wristwatch or grand piano, in which case the trash/treasure thing could hold, but generally it’s a motto for the averagely weird, the sort of people who go on Cash in the Attic and eagerly scan the newspaper for free items. Let’s face it though, almost everything featured on Cash in the Attic is complete tat, and is only valuable because some cretin with far too much money takes a shine to it. Or just sees it as an investment, a chance to profit from another similarly cretinous oaf in a few years time. So in conclusion, we should adapt the adage in question to something akin to “One man’s trash is thoroughly unlikely to be another man’s treasure.” Anyway, that’s this topic thoroughly exhausted, so I’m off to make more soggy tissues for strange people to poke through. Oh, and it’s mucus. Sickos.